When dinosaurs ruled the earth

February ended with a roar, a dinosaur roar! Unlike space, transportation and animals which were easy hits back when we were doing monthly themes, I wasn't sure how B would take to dinos - I mean, the names are hard to pronounce and animals are all dead and scary looking (except for Barney, but he's not quite ... real). By the end though, B was impersonating the T-Rex walk, wrapping his tongue around "triceratops," "apatosaurus," "stegosaurus," and knew how to spell "D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R." A success!

Lucky for us, there were TWO great dinosaur showcases in Singapore this past month, both different yet good. We first visited Titans of the Past - Dinosaurs and Ice Age Mammals at the Science Center. To be honest, we'd trekked out west before for the Megabugs Return exhibit but weren't too impressed. I felt the center overall could do with some upgrading. However, this time around, we were pleasantly surprised by the toddler friendly activities and animations that managed to keep two 2+ year boys entertained throughout! It's a shame the exhibit is over so soon (25 October 2013 - 23 February 2014) and not that well publicized - when we went on a Thursday afternoon, there were less than 10 visitors there. Besides pressing all the buttons to animate the dinos roaring and eating, B also enjoyed the mini paleontologists dig (aka sandpit) where they could brush for fossils.

We also went to Dinosaurs: Dawn To Extinction at the ArtScience Museum (25 January - 25 May 2014), getting there just before 5p in time for the free English tour. IMO, the exhibits here were of better quality and clearer presentation, with bone fossils AND life size models, info boards and occasional activity stations. The caveat was we had to pay admission for B whereas he got in free (under 3 years) at the Science Center. That said, even distracted mommy retained a few bits of knowledge in between making sure my lil live dino didn't break anything!

B attempted to fit all the puzzles, but most were set too high for toddlers - and he's quite tall at 95cm+ (for 27 months). He also enjoyed the model of the walking T-Rex and the footprint section, where you could make your own track, identify and compare various footprint tracks.

Go here to see the other kid-friendly events and activities coming in March (booking required) if you have older kids, 6 years and up. Some of the hands-on/take home crafts that we did included a 3D mock up of an apatosaurus and making wayang kulit dino-age birds and lizards (shadow puppets).

To reinforce the theme at home, we did more art and craft and of course, library books!

Cutting out letters, dino shapes and rolling eggs from playdough makes a happy B

Making a dino foam penholder and paint-stamping dinos using styrofoam:

Tracing and colouring pre-writing worksheets from here. His fine motor skills aren't great, but he's slowly improving, i.e. changing colours for different objects, following straight and curvy lines, etc.

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Tidings of comfort and joy

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! This advent season, I wanted to impress on B the true meaning of Jesus' birth and how it is not just about gifting but also the act of giving, and God's ultimate gift of life. Although it was hard to break free from all the commercialism, we found a few simple ways to reflect this while still doing our fair share of Christmas mall hopping :)

We made an advent calendar from B's artwork with clear plastic pockets to mark the 24 days, which was December 1 to 24 this year. I liked how this simple template could be re-used many times for things like learning numbers, letters, words, days and months, etc. Each day, we prayed for specific family, friends, those in need, our country and world, ending with the fruits of the spirit -- which B coincidentally learned in Sunbeam (Sunday School) year. On Christmas morning, we visited a single mother of 5 kids as part of our church's community blessing project before joining our cell group for food and carols. I look forward to more fun, faith-based activities as he grows up. For 2014, we could try this weekly series based on proverbs, more on the fruits or even try working through this catechism as our church's awesome new Devotional Journal weekly family section doesn't quite work for young tots.

Of course, we also covered the usual Christmas craft and books. Between work, colds, family visits, playdates, parties and our year end holiday to Hong Kong, we couldn't complete a nativity project or join many church events. After reading some books and our toddler bible, B recalls the nativity story by acting out a pregnant mama (Mary), old hunched men with presents (three wise men) and a wailing baby (Jesus).... It's a start I guess ;)

As for craft, this time around I let him try cutting, gluing, threading (punched holes around the art), and letter tracing (glued glitter on words).  We started with a Christmas star for the tree, stockings and poinsettas. We used the remaining painted rolls to make a turkey for a friend's Thanksgiving dinner. 

Wreath with holly, berries and gingerbread men
(Grandma made those cute origami mini-Santa Clauses)

Sticking ornaments on a car track painted Christmas card for his cousin

Home-made watercoloured ornaments :)

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer 

 

B in a snow globe

Collage art of peace, love and joy - the last 3 days in our advent calendar

Turning 2 has been a tipping point with some of the worst and best developments to date. B started shrieking for attention, tipping over his bowl/plate/cup when almost done (sooo annoying!), had bouts of skipped naps, early waking and general crankiness throughout the day. On the plus side, his interest in print (numbers and letters) keeps growing. He correctly spells out most words in big letters, is getting better at small letters, loves counting as well as spotting numerals. To my delight, soon after his birthday, he finally started singing. In tune! All the time! What was previously a monotone rap transformed into spontaneous singing and dancing to favourite songs and those he hears often (i.e. Jingle Bells). I even caught him singing nursery songs that I used to hum to him as a baby. Quite amazing what our kids retain at this age!

This Thursday, B will start half-day nursery, with mommy joining for a few hours/days before transitioning to a complete drop-off. I got him a personalised preschooler book, and also printed out photos of his new school to add to our scrap book to get him familiar with the concept.  It's encouraging that the school also focuses on being global citizens, i.e. donating for charity and recycling for art.  Here's hoping B's new journey with Odyssey will be even more rewarding and fun than it's been with mommy and me so far.

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To add a library to a house is to give that house a soul

Lately, B spontaneously calls out letters he recognises and sometimes sings the A-B-C Song while he pretends to "read" the print. Looks like he's taking the next step to read WORDS on his own initiative, and not just recite from memory, vocalise or narrate what he sees. What a nice milestone for our brand new 2 year old :) B's also developed a list of places to ask for when we're getting ready to go out. To my secret bookworm delight, we hear "go library and read book" almost every other day! Other regulars include "Bus stop and MRT?", "play outside, playground, park", "Botanic Gardens" (where he likes feeding the fish), "ama 公公", "爷爷 奶奶" and his buddies' "house", "buy food at Fairprice" (we grocery shop together a lot), "ride toy car/train at shopping mall", "music" and "Chinese class" (i.e. Kindermusik, Jiggle Wigs, Chengzhu). It's encouraging to see all the time and effort in immersing him in a print and word-rich environment paying off - from getting his first library card at 7 weeks (!), daily newspaper browsing and storytimes, thematic flashcards if he wants to, and just when we relax, chat and read quietly together.

We couldn't have done it without the network of public libraries in Singapore, notably the Bishan, Toa Payoh and Central NLB branches. The breadth and depth of parenting, baby and preschool books to toddler/family friendly activities is amazing AND free (or reasonable enough if you're a foreigner). B's been exposed to a wider range of authors, formats, topics - in both English and Chinese - than I ever was at his age. The books expand his vocabulary and imagination, plus save us money and reduce clutter with more informed buying (i.e. the read-everyday or hard-to-find ones) mainly online via The Book Depository, Fishpond or at the local Popular bookstore. 

Last, a shout out to Fun With Tots, an ongoing series of six library workshops on print motivation, print awareness, phonological awareness, letter knowledge, narrative skills and vocabulary.  I didn't know what to expect when I signed up with B, but was pleasantly surprised by the dedication of each of the librarians who prepared a handout of notes/resources and facilitated their topics with songs, books, parent/caregiver tips to keep everyone from adults to the little tots engaged. Even though it was close to bedtime (8p), B enjoyed each session and would say "go library at night"!  The only disappointment was that so few folks attended. It's ironic that parents prefer to spend money (sometimes up to ~$50-$100 per session) on enrichment classes based on early childhood experts, but can't make time to visit the library or attend a hands-on workshop together (which BTW, costs $2 per 30 min session). Even if our kids attend daycare or preschool, or we work full time, we should still actively participate in fostering a love of reading, a thirst for knowledge and the capacity to imagine in our kids. Seeing is doing and believing. My dad was dubious when I wanted to borrow books on space for B ... who liked it so much that he could eventually name or describe all the planets in the solar system!

SO.... Head on over to your neighbourhood library and browse/borrow some books for the holidays.  You can also find out what's going on at Bounce, the NLB channel dedicated to kids 0 to 12.  BTW, if like B, your kid is just learning his letters and enjoys music, take a look at all these alphabet songs and see what works best!

"The more that you read, the more things you will know. 

The more you learn, the more places you'll go." 
- Dr. Seuss, "I Can Read With My Eyes Shut!"

Warp speed ahead

My month long (un)common cold resulted in an excessive white blood count which was double the average and one day in A&E when all my joints were inflammed!  I finally caved in to see doc #1 who cleared B and I of bronchitis, but gave me antibiotics and allergy/congestion meds that I reacted badly to.... this led me to doc #2 who found some lung tissue scarring from my x-ray but nothing critical after various tests. He then prescribed painkillers, even more antibiotics and asked me to stop the previous meds. After 1 week of pill-popping and clinic hopping, I'm feeling closer to normal again.

Besides that, October turned out to be a full-on month of milestones and learning through play with B.  Even though I'm with him almost all the time, his growth spurts still amaze me, not just physically, but also how well he picks up vocabulary and grammar.  After accomplishing a task on his own (like his jigsaw puzzles), he claps and says "Yay! Good job, B!" or if he's cheeky, "pandai boy" \o/ At breakfast one day, he placed his toy kangaroo on the table and said "Kangaroo watch B and mama eat pancake" and "daddy go 运动, then work” when dad went for his morning gym workout.  While in the car, he describes what he sees on the road and at times, will launch into a narrative, mainly on vehicles (of course), e.g. "Fire engine park in fire station, make loud noise nee-nah-nee-nah, lights go blink blink, firemen put out fire, many smoke, hot!"

We covered Geography and Astronomy which mommy and B thoroughly enjoyed.  We looked at continents, oceans, water and land formations, and then, our solar system. (I know this may seem odd, but he started asking questions about rivers, stars and satellites ... so what to do?!)

Map of the world on a paper plate where rubber band = equator between the hemispheres;

some of the library books (this time, the selection was quite good!);

 

an ocean/rockpool diorama, using a re-cycled box;

 penguins and icebergs in Antartica; 

land and water formations (which double up as bases for modelling clay/water);

And last but not least, sand art and puzzles on space: the final frontier!  This was also a perfect opportunity to learn comparatives and superlatives, i.e. planet Earth is smaller than Saturn, Mercury is the smallest, Jupiter is the biggest!   Now he applies these words in all sorts of situations :)

This month was also about confidence building and independence.  He started to enjoy scooting on the YBike glider which we have on loan from a friend.  He's walking his brand-new Kazam balance bike, an early birthday gift from 爷爷.  He even climbed out of his toddler cot bed once, alarming everyone! B grew more cautious climbing since that incident while I placed his large foam playmat under the bed until we switch him to a kid bed (or just a mattress). And on a bittersweet note, B got off the waitlist for N1 next January - it's a half day, drop off for the year they turn 3. Lots of implications there, some of which I'm still processing internally.

Wheeee!  

我爱我的动物

July saw a big leap forward in B's cognitive, and in particular, speech development. Words started to "click" and it was great to be there with him along the way.

Theme: Animals!  It started with us doing an extended craft activity around Margaret Wise Brown's "Big Red Barn" when we were stuck indoors during the worst of the haze.  The rest of the month was spent on tonnes of books, songs, art and craft, puzzles and outings. We even managed to make this bilingual as B's new Chinese term was all around the 农场 (Farm) 

ABC or Art, Books and Craft: Maybe it was a matter of time but I felt like we found a key to unlock his brain by engaging in more kinesthetic learning this month. We expanded upon a few fave books with a big red barn diorama, a zoo numbers and colouring activity based on Eric Carle's "123 To The Zoo," and built our own family tree after reading "Who's Like Me."  Some highlights below:

Music and Movement: I finally brought all 6 kids CDs into the car to play on repeat whenever it's just B and me.  From the classic Old MacDonald (he loves the E-I-E-I-O!) and Incy Wincy Spider actions to his Chinese Playclub's ditties like "我爱我的" and "母鸭带小鸭" as well as Kindermusik's Morning Song (with different greetings for animals/people).  It was nice to see him not only sing to the words and rhythm but overcome his shyness to move and dance along.

Outings: No surprise, we went back to the zoo to check out the Breakfast With Orang Utans with friends (overpriced, not worth it!) and the new Frozen Tundra polar bear exhibit (cool!). Next time, we'll visit in the afternoon as B is up longer and can catch more live shows.  We also went to the Maritime Experiential Museum and Aquarium (nice, esp. the spider crabs, jellyfish and dolphins). Here's other animal adventure places we hoped to/will visit as there wasn't enough time to see them all! 

Personal:
- Hearing B say "I love you" (sounds more like "I low you") melts my heart :)
- I know I've said it earlier, but the Big Red Barn opened up a world of language, esp. speech for him.  He comes up with 3-word descriptors like "big purple ball" (i.e. my yogilates ball) and "dark blue sky" (the view from his window when he wakes). Loves to make animal and vehicle sounds, say opposites thanks to Dr Seuss (big/small, in/out, up/down, high/low), colours (primary+secondary+some tertiary), numbers (1-10) and family names. His thirst for books seemed to have grown exponentially too. He demands to read "more, more books" every time and delights in finishing up familiar sentences or words. Of course, he repeats interesting new words in English, Malay, Chinese and especially, my in-car swearing :0
- Self feeds when hungry and when he likes his food.  Otherwise, he'll eat with distractions and/or help.  Developed a temporary bad habit of throwing down his spoon/fork/food when done or cranky, but that's stopped now since I told him off with frequent reminders to put it down on the table (practicing les gros yeux!)
- Naps are still too short but nights are great so we're rolling with it. I get my downtime or work done at night, spend quality time with him in the mornings, try to take him out each day with a special/ family outing once a week
- Potty training still ongoing, slow and easy.  Undies at home, diapers when out
- All in, it's been a pretty awesome though tiring month.  Gratifying to see the effort pay off, esp. when I wonder what's become of me and where I'm headed this year....

You can never talk too much ... to your kid

I just finished Jill Stamm's "Bright From The Start" and was encouraged by her section on how live, repetitive interaction boosts early language development. Language development begins in utero.  Understanding its use begins as infants interact with family and caregivers, while language acquisition explodes by the time they're three years old. Babies are born physically equipped to hear distinct language sounds (phonemes). By age one, they tune out words not frequently spoken around them, which in turn, they cannot easily pronounce.  In fact, normal and deaf-signing toddlers go thru similar language development milestones: 1st word (11-14 mos), two word combos (16-22 mos), complex rule-driven communication by 3 years on.  While the ability to read early is not consistently linked to advanced intellectual performance later in a life, it's increasingly necessary to excel in local school, and thus, influence self-esteem et al.

Live, repetitive interaction is not about putting a CD, radio or video on constantly nor about having a non-stop verbal diarrhea with your child.  Rather: 

0-6 mos: 

• Use intentional parentese to stimulate brain and extend attention span
• Speak Multi or Bilingual naturalistically, preferably with dedicated caregivers or playdates
• Engage him face to face at an appropriate distance, use music, hang photos, selected mobiles
• Lap read! Enables a visual embrace as you and child are looking at the same object.  Start short (5 min) but frequent, 4 mos on when visual acuity improves and he can reach out to see and touch objects/pages

6-18 mos: 

• Deliberately point and label objects by name (light, door), attributes of objects, highlighting ones that are same or contrasting ( smooth, rough, big, small, square, round, blue, red), feelings (tired, hungry, happy)
• Read over and over!  Hold him close, let him turn pages randomly and be hands on (fine motor skill practice). Modulate voice and facial expressions, even use props to invite participation. Vary intonation to match enthusiasm, emotion, meaning.  Intro simple books with 1-2 sentences per page and plenty of rhythm, rhyme, repetition, rhyming songs, and random play with rhyming words. Knowledge (i.e. retention) generally kicks in after two weeks of repetition
• Talk frequently! Describe actions and objects. Positive tone, conversational interactions. 

18-36 mos:

• Dialogic reading: Read with children while engaging them throughout.  Describe the illustrations (where's the frog, how many), describe what they think is happening, predict what might happen next (what's he doing, where's he going), personalise ideas (remember the frog at the park?), share feelings about things in the story, leave lines incomplete -- let them fill in the blanks!
• Start simple music lessons (keyboard, violin, percussion). Sing fave songs esp with actions
• Follow tots lead on interests and expose them to environmental print (EP). Read all around you, ask open ended questions. Differentiate printing vs pictures vs sounds that describe them

3 years on: Phonemic awareness (ability to hear beginning, middle and ending sounds), Phonics (linking sounds to letters) and EP recognition evolves by then too.  
Choose books that match your child's brain level of engagement.  Stages of a reader (based on cognitive development):

1. Attends to pictures, doesn't form stories - picture/photo books, flash cards
2. Attends to pictures, forms oral stories - creates own story across the pages with "nonsense talk" - listener has to see pictures to follow along 
3. Attends to pictures, forms written stories - spoken words and intonations sound like reading 
4. Attends to print - recounts and retells stories they already know while pointing to the print rather than pictures, not actually "reading" 

Recommended tot books (the list is endless, here's a few from her book)

1. Interactive/lift the flap - Dr Seuss, Margaret Wise Brown, Karen Katz. Baby Dance (Taylor, A). Fit-A-Shape: Shapes.  Where's My Fuzzy Blanket (Carter, N). Wheels on the Bus (Stanley, M). Touch and Talk: Make Me Say Moo (Greig, E). Quack Quack, Who's That? (Noel, D). 
2. Emotions: Winnie the Pooh: Feelings (Smith, R).  WOW! Babies (GEntius). Faces (Miglis, J). Baby Faces (Miller, M). Where the Wild things Are (Sendak, M).  Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (Viorst, J).  The Selfish Crocodile (Charles, F). Glad Monster, Sad Monster: A Book About Feelings (Emberley, E). No David! (Shannon, D)
3. Rhyme & Rhythm: Dr Seuss, Margaret Wise Brown. Each Peach Pear Plum (Ahlberg), Moo, Baa, La La La (Boynton). Five Little Ducks (Raffi). Five Little Monkeys (Christelow). This Old Man (Jones). The Itsy Bitsy Spider (Trapani). Find the Puppy (Cox)
4. Scribbling (Pre-Drawing/Writing):  Crayon World (Santomero), Figure Out Blue's Clues (Perello). Blue's Treasure Hunt Notebook (Santomero). Harold and the Purple Crayon (Johnson). Get in Shape to Write (Bongiorno). Messages in the Mailbox; How to Write a Letter (Leedy)
5. EP books: Cheerios Play Book (Wade).  M&Ms Counting Board book (McGrath). Pepperidge Farm Goldfish Counting Fun Book (McGrath). Kellogg's Froot Loops (McGrath).  Sun Maid Raisins Playbook (Weir).  Oreo Cookie Counting Book (Albee).
6. Helping Young Children Learn Language and Literacy: Birth Through Kindergarten (Vukelich, C. Christie, J. Enz, BJ)

I did what I knew, and when I knew better, I did better

June was an exercise in child-led learning.   Forget about class or mommy's "lesson plans," our theme was on B's all time favourite things...

Theme:
(1) Things that go:  It started out with us reading Brian Biggs' excellently illustrated vehicle series, esp.  Everything Goes: In The Air for days up till (and after) B's first flight to Phuket.  Shortly after, his Chengzhu holiday program took the Playclub tots on the Duck Tour bus AND boat.  Then we ended up flying again (aka the unplanned haze-cation) to Penang. For a boy already crazy about wheels and diggers, it only seemed natural that this ended up as our special monthly theme

(2) Shapes: Learning shapes is fun and easier as B recognises his rainbow colours (he calls indigo "dark bool" ;) Besides the hand-me-down shape sorters, blocks and a timely Gymnademics home package set, we reinforced shapes through bean bag games, geometric foam pictures and playdough

Routine:
We used lots of puzzles this month given B's growing interest (and affinity) for this. Besides the wooden peg puzzles, we took out slightly harder board and magnetised ones.  It takes him some time to get the alignment right even if he knows where it should go. But he takes them out from the boxes himself to work at it almost every day.  For a boy that can't stay at a task too long, this is quite a feat! We also used more representative learning to support what B would see in real life, i.e. block building a "duck bus/boat", drawing the jet pilots and helicopters flying by for National Day rehearsal, browsing through books, transportation art and flashcards with photos and/or illustrated print, role playing with toys and sound effects, etc. We even tried threading with his Good Night construction site set. Speaking of which, B can thread in and occasionally flips it over to thread out but doesn't quite know? have patience? to keep threading the next sequence.

Art and Craft:  So many this month given the special occasions, but no time to complete a big special project (that one's already WIP for next month). Our top 2 faves:

(1) Fathers' Day card - B made 3 this year, 1 for dad, 1 for each grandpa

(2) Garden montage of ziplocked paint, bubble wrap prints and cut-out shapes

Outings:  June was children's season and school holidays.  So... You guessed it!  We went back to the Singapore Art Museum (awesome Enchanted Garden kids exhibit) and Gardens By The Bay (Flight of Fancy's hot air balloons). We also visited the Philatelic Museum to see geek!mom's Star Wars exhibit.  With the Singapore Duck Tour, Phuket and Penang trips, B is slowly touring his way through Southeast Asia ;)

Personal:

- Mealtimes are back to normal, even better in fact since our Penang trip.  B feeds himself, has a robust appetite, is keen to try new things, and most importantly, happily eats fruits and veggies again! At his 18.5 month check in/jab, B weighed 12.5 kg.  He couldn't stand still to measure the height, but based on his ex-pants shorts and pajamas, he's definitely over 86 cm!

- Sleeps well overnight (~11 hours straight) but his naps have gotten shorter (~1 hour average) even on days when he's so tired and nodding off by 1130a!  He tends to wake up crying from his nap yet will only sleep longer if we rock and hold him.  Another regression? Separation anxiety again?  Just roll with it?
- Resumed potty training which I started / stopped earlier this year.  This time, we are going the distance  i.e. no diapers while at home and playdates.  Also bought another, lighter single piece "portette"

- At times, he shows a little stubborn and willful streak so I've been more firm with discipline, insisting he continues with the basic home "routine" (incl. helping out, cleaning up), and not giving in to his temper tantrums. So far, nothing unmanageable (yet! yet!)

- Steady progress language and cognition wise. He's started to fill in missing words from familiar stories and songs, repeat new words that he's able (willing?) to vocalise and put 2 simple words together like "eat/no more", "back door."  Oh, and he's asking "WHY?" ;) It helps that I'm reading more specific books with big fonts, few words like the Dr Seuss and Margaret Wise Brown classics, in addition to our usual dialogic, fun but variable stories. Besides English, he seems to find Malay/Bahasa easier to pick up but that could be b/c I've been quite negligent with Chinese since our holiday break! Of course, if I were honest, for a verbal mom like me who talks, sings and reads to him constantly, I do wish at times that he could say more earlier! But he's developing at his own pace and all is well

- I made his first photobook to help make reading (pages, prints, photos) more personal and fun for him. Also as an alternative to flicking through photos and videos on my smartphone.  He seems to enjoy flipping through it and it grounds him esp. when we are away from home.  Small steps worth continuing and building on

- We STILL haven't committed to 2014 nursery for B next year .... Talk about kiasu!  Yet even with my sporadic homeschooling efforts (longer task/wishlist than actual), I still feel we're doing ok and giving B a better experience at this age

Secrets of the toddler whisperer

Tracy Hogg's book was full of gentle yet sound parenting advice. I liked her approach, fun acronyms and practical examples on how to manage those tricky toddler years. She's not an advocate of spanking - I'm not sure where I stand on this yet as it's quite a change for those who were raised with Asian parents/homes.

Everyday H.E.L.P with tots:
Hold Back.  For the purposes of observation, which is not the same as being detached, rejecting or ignoring your toddler
Encourage to Explore.  Ensure there are many opportunities a day for exploration, including let him play quietly with another child, try to solve puzzles or stack blocks on his own.  Don't constantly direct, monitor and instruct.
Live with Limits. Too much of anything is usually not good. Don't give too many choices, allow too much stimulation or participation in non-age appropriate activities.  Don't wait too long before reining in tantrums, aggressiveness or other high emotions.  Curtail activities that aren't good in big doses e.g. sweets, TV.
Praise Appropriately. Praise to reinforce specific acts of cooperation, kindness or behaviour

Routines and Rituals (R&R) continue to be important, perhaps even more so at this age. It provides security, cuts down on struggles, helps tots deal with separation, supports all kinds of learning - physical, emotional control, social behaviour, avoids problems by helping parents set clear consistent boundaries, allows everyone to slow down and connect.  Tailor R&R to your family -- starting with waking, eating, bathing, exits and entrances, clean up, nap and bedtimes.  Everytime you repeat and reinforce an act, you are doing R&R -- for better or worse!

H.E.L.P also applies to potty training which should begin between 18 mos - 2 years.
Hold back until you see signs he's ready. E.g. Some stop dead in their tracks, stand still, focus and suddenly move on.
Encourage him to connect bodily function with words and actions. Narrate what's going on when you change the diaper, invest in a freestanding potty and his fave toy "go to the bathroom"
Limit his time on the potty. No more than 2-3 minutes
Praise widely when something is deposited!

4Ps aren't limited to Marketing either ;)  They're also critical to potty training success:
Potty - one that fits his size and pants/panties once they go on the potty at least 3x/ day
Patience - never rush the process or look disappointed when he doesn't pee or poop or causes an accident. All kids progress at their own speed
Practice - as much as he can
Presence - sit with him and cheer him own

The rate of language development is determined by exposure to language and interaction with talkers (constant conversation, eye contact), gender (girls tend to talk earlier), other developmental gains taking precedence (esp. walking, manual/social growth, etc.), birth order (younger tends to talk later) and genetic disposition. Also setbacks may occur if there's a sudden change in the home (new baby, mom goes back to work, relocation, etc.). A different sort of TLC also applies during these critical years: Talk, Listen, Clarify. Pay attention to non-verbal and verbal signals. Look him in the eye when you talk/listen. Talk in short, simple sentences. Ask simple, direct questions to allow him to express himself.  Play word games to foster interaction, practice and learning. Exercise restrain and patience.

Common speech milestones and red flags by age below.
8-12 mos: Can speak and associate mama and dada.  Respond to 1-step commands ("Please give the car to mama").  Watch if: child doesn't respond to her name, babble (long/short groups of sounds), doesn't look when people talk to her, doesn't point or makes sounds to get what he wants

12-18 mos: Says first words: simple nouns ("dog," "baby"), names of special people, action words/phrases ("up," "go"). May follow 1 or 2-step commands ("Go into your room and get the towel"). Watch if: child doesn't say a word or two, even unclearly

18-24 mos: Says up to 10 different words, understands 30 or more. Speaks lots of gibberish :) Watch if: Child can't say more than a few words clearly, follow simple requests ("come here") or respond to simple questions with a "yes" or "no"

2-3 years: Has a word for everything! Combines words into sentences to express thoughts and feelings. Extensive vocab even though grammar isn't perfect. Can converse with adult. Watch if: Child uses fewer than 50 words and has no word combinations. Can't understand opposities/different meanings ("up/down") or follow 2-step commands. Doesn't notice or overacts to environmental sounds, e.g. horn

Last but not least, it's important to teach your tot self control. I thought Hogg's approach here was a little wishful thinking so one possible application would be to first try Karp's prehistoric parenting where parents speak (not act) like the little Neanderthal to get their attention and show empathy, and THEN try Hogg's suggestion of conscious discipline and offering choices through statements and questions. Rather than resort to demands/threats which (admit it!) come immediately to our minds, do/say if he's:
- Overstimulated and/or running inappropriately/too much.  Stop/restrain him, pick him up and remove from the activity if needed. "I see.... Let's take a walk outside. You can't keep running here. We'll leave once you've put your socks/shoes on."
- Throwing a tantrum in public for something he wants but can't/shouldn't have. Ignore it. "Wow, that's impressive. But you still can't have it.  Do you want to come over here by yourself or shall I get you?"
If that doesn't work, remove him. "You can't behave like this here."
- Refuses to cooperate while dressing or diaper changing. Stop, wait a while/calm him down, try again. "When you're ready, we'll dress up. Shall we change your diaper now or after you finish this snack?"
- Shouts, lower your own voice. "Let's use our quiet voice"
- Whines, look him in the eye and imitate a best (non-whiny) noise. "I can't hear you unless you use your best voice"
- Kicks/hits when you pick him up, put him down immediately.  "Do not hit/kick. It hurts."
- Grabs another toy from a kid. Stand up, go near and encourage him to give it back. "If you can't let go of M's toy, I can help you... M was playing with that. You should give it back to him. Thank you -- what good cooperation. Now would you like to hold/play with this?"
- Throws food.  Take him down from the chair.  "We don't throw food at the table." If he doesn't want to finish/wants to go out.  "When you've finished eating, then we can go to the playground."
- Pulls another child's hair/hits another child. Put your hand on his hand, stroke gently. Restrain him or take him outside if agitated.  "Be gentle. No pulling, no hitting. That hurts!" Worse case: Go home.

Month 10 Week 2: Little man cometh!

These past few weeks, B seems to become more and more like a little man :D  

- Got his first haircut!  Quite stylish, and actually complements his big head that's slightly flat on the back, hehe

- Drinks his own sippy cup, self feeds cookies/biscuits/fruits, eats slightly mashed foods (no more purees) 

- Verbal diarrhea and cognitive milestones!  Responds to cues by looking, pointing, signing and occasionally doing the right actions.  He can "show me the cars/wheels/balls/etc", turn on the light switch, aircon and fan buttons, goes to and picks up books/bottle when he wants to read/drink, shakes his head, waves his hands, raises his arms.... Also coos, gurgles, babbles all the time!

- Stands upright, letting go briefly. Cruises more confidently, holds onto and pushes objects while on the go

- Loves music and movement so I've started him on Monday bounce & rhyme sessions in the park, including circle time in our Wednesday playdates and signed him up for Friday Kindermusik Village classes in early October (each term lasts 8 weeks)
- Going for his first Chinese immersion class at Julia Gabriel's Chengzhu Mandarin holiday programme.  This should be quite an experience as my Chinese is terrible, and he's mainly been exposed to English (and Malay/Bahasa) at home.  If he takes well to it, I may consider signing up for regular classes there

- Finally met his maternal uncle on a surprise visit from San Francisco (via Seoul) -- hooray!  

- Got his Singapore passport (along with mommy!) in time for his first overseas trip this weekend.  Wish us luck!  I suspect we'll have to bring more stuff for him than all of our own combined ;)